Why You Should Seek Ego Death
Ego is already important to you.
That’s because it is a constant factor of consciousness. Your sense of personhood is developed consciously and subconsciously into the subjective self-identity which comprises ego. Ego is the “I.” Ideas about your character and soul are formed at the innermost level which reflect not only in a silent monologue of thoughts and esteem, but also externally through the way you interact and respond in your environments. More important than understanding the definition and essence of ego is to understand how ego operates within us. Popularized by Sigmund Freud, the term ‘ego’ refers to what prevents humans from acting on primal urges as it works to achieve a balance with moral and idealistic societal standards. Ego is critical to reason and sanity. It regulates the means through which we decide to act and react. By this definition, it is easy to understand why ego is built into the crux of our being; to maintain lawfulness, to control behavior, to justify decision-making, amongst other useful complexities. Why, then, should you seek to destroy it?
Destruction of individual sense of self has been referred to as ego death, or ego dissolution, and is continuously studied from philosophical, spiritual, scientific, and academic points of view. Interest in ego remains high due to the relevance of self-identity to mental health and wellness. The recurring theme of self-identity in mental health conditions indicates that ego is imperative to consider. Distorted or inflated self-identity affects mental stability in paramount ways; too much ‘ego’, or an over-inflated self of sense, is a contributor to personality disorders such as narcissism. On the contrary, too little self-esteem and self-worth are associated with personality disorders such as borderline personality disorder, both conditions classified by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5). Therefore, the total loss of one’s comprised sense of self could actually be beneficial to the person whose self-identity is the contributing factor to problematic behavior.
“Losing ego is gaining the capacity and awareness for new revelations which could be limited by your current sense of self.”
Theories about ego death say that it is akin to enlightenment. Even for those satisfied with their mental wellness and confident about their stability, shrinking the importance or presence of ego is a helpful tool to improve self-control and success. Because the perception of self influences perceptions of the world and how people should navigate in it, the loss or deterioration of self can similarly deteriorate barriers that restrict perspective. Losing ego is gaining the capacity and awareness for new revelations which could be limited by your current sense of self. While not as extreme as complete ego death, actively working to reduce or detach from ego is an opportunity to learn beyond the limits of a singular mindframe and traverse paths once hidden by the biases of ego. This recognition can stimulate growth as you become able to recognize that who you are is not the sum of how you identify or what you identify with.
What would you be without everything you have, who would you be without the names you call yourself? Ego is not inherently unhealthy, but it is confining in nature. It creates and reinforces attachments (to thoughts, emotions, occupations) to sustain self-concept. Self-identity can limit you from the facets of yourself which exist beyond new aspirations, heights, and goals, because it is only aware of what you already are and not of the potential of what you can become.
Identification with form and role contributes to ego, but acknowledging the impermanent and fluid nature of these classifications–race, body, age, money, sexuality, career, association to another human being, etc–will reduce the need to seek fleeting pleasures which further attachments to a label. Ultimately, these labels are constructs of the world but all rooted in the mind. Ego uses these classifications for sustenance, but they are learned concepts such as time and guilt. You are not your titles or your thoughts, and they can sometimes hold you back. Detaching from notions of self takes conscious effort, but it does not mean to entirely “kill” ego as the name ego death implies. Rather, it presents a way to manage ego, by lessening it in ways which can help you become more than your beliefs about yourself.
“Ultimately, these labels are constructs of the world but all rooted in the mind.”
Worrying about what you should have said or how you should have acted, comparing yourself to others, wondering how people are thinking and feeling towards you–all of these musings are driven by ego. Separation from ego can feel uncomfortable, but can be practiced to reduce the strength of the ego. Loss of ego has been likened to the feeling of a spiritual awakening, wherein a person lets go of attachments to beliefs that cause pain and does not judge thoughts and experiences as good or bad. The alternative which remains is to simply accept what is happening without classifying it as positive or negative. Chasing ‘good’ feelings and avoiding ‘bad’ feelings will still feel futile when using the ego to evaluate these occurrences. Being present and accepting of what is happening at face value instead of ascribing it additional meaning will increase peace and diminish the control of your ego.
Practice can help separate you from your ego’s notions of self. Any mindfulness activity which serves to return you to the present moment and increase awareness of physical truths applies here, whether aerobic exercise, breathwork exercise, meditation, or yoga. Your ego does not have to control you once you realize that you are not tethered to any thoughts or actions by anything anywhere except in your mind. To regain control, return to physicality.
Khadia is a student of Ashesi University, a contributing writer to Very Temporary, and Lead Executive Editor at The Blue Train Initiative. Reach out via email to inquire and connect.
